A year that includes your children coming home from the NICU, and your neighbors house blowing up 5 days before you close your sale (and still ended up closing the deal!) results in numerous reasons to be thankful. I won't leave you with a list of our many blessings, I'll only pick one, one thing I've never knew existed before this year.
I am very thankful to be part of the community of families that have disabled children. I'm thankful for the warm smiles from strangers that I pass. Smiles that say, it's going to be okay, you can do it! I'm thankful for conversations with strangers, where there is a fundamental common bond. I'm grateful when people make a big fuss over Sam and ignore Coraline (who is t he one who usually gets all the attention).
This year the invisible has become visible, I am grateful for new friends I have made, and people I no longer over look. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Mommy Milestone
The journey of parenthood is full of many milestones, just like childhood development. My husband and I regularly joke that we're leveling up and often celebrate when we feel we have acquired ‘advanced’ parenting skills! For example, when we first started changing diapers we were sooooo slow, we’d make sure everything was done perfect, if you told me a year later I'd know how to diaper a baby that was crawling away from me, I would have looked at you like a deer in headlights, unable to comprehend how that is even possible.
Well, last week I hit another parent milestone, I was on Facebook looking at some beautiful pictures of my friends son, and I thought to myself, he’s really a beautiful baby, but the poor mom, she just isn't lucky enough to a have a son with Down syndrome. It was the first time EVER that I had seen myself as truly fortunate to be on this journey. It was such a freeing moment, no jealousy, no self-pity...
I will not declare that this has been an easy battle in my head, nor that those feelings are gone for good. We all have our good days and bad days and see the grass greener on the other side. We live society our culture values three things, beauty, intelligence and money.
As parents we get so caught up in babies milestones, we are a culture that obsesses about 'success'. I dare say we worship success.
Society has taught many of us out there in highly technical fields, our worth to society is our intellect. I have to admit that I associated an individual’s worth to their intelligence and since becoming a mother of a son with Down syndrome I have learned the error of my former thinking.
My challenge to many of you (and mostly myself!) is to be aware of these milestones, but not to obsess over them, or compare your child to other kids. Enjoy children for the individuals that they are, pay attention to where they excel, encourage them to work in areas they need to improve. Take joy in every milestone, don’t waste your energy worrying about those milestones yet met. Being ‘slow’ at something isn’t a big deal, it just makes you human. Now… I’ll let you know when Mommy reaches this milestone!
Well, last week I hit another parent milestone, I was on Facebook looking at some beautiful pictures of my friends son, and I thought to myself, he’s really a beautiful baby, but the poor mom, she just isn't lucky enough to a have a son with Down syndrome. It was the first time EVER that I had seen myself as truly fortunate to be on this journey. It was such a freeing moment, no jealousy, no self-pity...
I will not declare that this has been an easy battle in my head, nor that those feelings are gone for good. We all have our good days and bad days and see the grass greener on the other side. We live society our culture values three things, beauty, intelligence and money.
As parents we get so caught up in babies milestones, we are a culture that obsesses about 'success'. I dare say we worship success.
Society has taught many of us out there in highly technical fields, our worth to society is our intellect. I have to admit that I associated an individual’s worth to their intelligence and since becoming a mother of a son with Down syndrome I have learned the error of my former thinking.
My challenge to many of you (and mostly myself!) is to be aware of these milestones, but not to obsess over them, or compare your child to other kids. Enjoy children for the individuals that they are, pay attention to where they excel, encourage them to work in areas they need to improve. Take joy in every milestone, don’t waste your energy worrying about those milestones yet met. Being ‘slow’ at something isn’t a big deal, it just makes you human. Now… I’ll let you know when Mommy reaches this milestone!
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Out of Beta
On the urging of some friends, and a deep desire to educate and advocate for my son Samuel, who has Trisomy-21 (aka Down syndrome) I am starting this blog journey. The past 12 months have been a year of firsts, many of which I would not like to repeat and many wonderful new adventures.
I was inspired to name this blog Profundity, after consistently being told individuals with Downs syndrome, are 'just such happy people.' While everyone meant well, this was not a comforting thought to this new parent, I didn't want my child to just simply be happy. I want them to be a complex individual with a full range of emotion, to be able to experience life in all its fullness, but also in all its struggles. There is something glorious and innately human about struggling, persevering, and accomplishing.
What I have come to realize is societies view of individual’s with Downs syndrome was so one-dimensional, not to be judgmental, I was there just a short year ago. The mission of this blog is to capture the adventures of the Ashton family and show the world that life with Down syndrome, while happy, is full and profound.
I was inspired to name this blog Profundity, after consistently being told individuals with Downs syndrome, are 'just such happy people.' While everyone meant well, this was not a comforting thought to this new parent, I didn't want my child to just simply be happy. I want them to be a complex individual with a full range of emotion, to be able to experience life in all its fullness, but also in all its struggles. There is something glorious and innately human about struggling, persevering, and accomplishing.
What I have come to realize is societies view of individual’s with Downs syndrome was so one-dimensional, not to be judgmental, I was there just a short year ago. The mission of this blog is to capture the adventures of the Ashton family and show the world that life with Down syndrome, while happy, is full and profound.
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